Case Studies
Vialli Property Management
The Stafford-based property management company approached Spencer & Browne in March 2022 regarding the interpretation and amendment of a series of troublesome leases. The documents in question were essentially unintelligible: English unfit for a year 6 SATs test, inexplicable swathes of Latin, idioms not in common parlance since the Black Plague, and at least one sentence written in a hitherto-uncracked cipher. One sentence in particular had us stumped for a while, running for over four pages without so much as a comma. Nonetheless, we persisted and, after a few arduous weeks, the beast—so to speak—was tamed.
Not only did we deliver a set of simplified, layperson-friendly summaries to our client, we added a bit of our own unintelligible nonsense here and there too, as a contribution to the continued, artificial necessity of the legal profession. We couldn't stop laughing as we began yet another sentence unaccountably with the word "forsooth"—in fact, the only thing more amusing to us than the thought of some poor sod trying to interpret our jibberish in years to come, is the exorbitant fee that they're bound to charge for the privilege.
Silveretta Retirement Village
Silveretta is a luxury retirement village located in Market Drayton, which promises its inhabitants "the home of a lifetime". One would imagine that most jump at the opportunity to move into such a facility, yet there exist individuals that need that little extra push. In 2021, Silveretta approached Spencer & Browne for our expert advice after a particularly troublesome resident-to-be got cold feet after the sudden loss of her husband.
Firstly, Margaret (name changed) took issue with the small percentage that Silveretta keep in the case of an eventual resale. We explained to her that, although the 15% payable in such an event is tantamount to daylight robbery, it is also something she'd have noticed if she'd bothered to read the very fine (barely legible) print on page 297 of her Lease. At Spencer & Browne, morality extends as long as the arm of the law, and no further.
Affordability was another concern of Margaret's, though happily this proved quite simple to resolve after persuading her to cash out her investment portfolio and write her only son out of her will.
Sovereign Affordable Housing
Sovereign Affordable Housing is a Stoke-on-Trent-based foundation which aims to improve access to high-quality, low-cost housing for those otherwise priced out of the property market. In December 2020, Sovereign approached us seeking expert advice in relation to a new housing development in the Burslem region. At Spencer & Browne, we have a long-standing policy of offering none of our services pro bono (being first and foremost a business), and so this illustrates just how much our work is valued.
Although the Burslem development ultimately proved unfeasible, we worked tirelessly around the clock to provide Sovereign with the most comprehensive possible assessment of the situation. In total we drafted over 4000 emails at £24 a pop, some more useful/informative to the client than others, but all equally lucrative for us.
In the spirit of giving something back to our community, when Sovereign encountered unanticipated financial difficulties the next month, we handled the sale of their Stoke premises and disbursed to them a £10 John Lewis gift voucher to say "thank you" for the repeat custom.
